I’m a big fan of Katy’s wit and attitude in Bigfoot Child Have Diabetes, so I wanted to stay true to her suggestion for today’s food-related theme for DBlog Week. Alas, I am embarrassed to say that I am on the “grad school diet,” a fad that I do not endorse for full health benefits. It amounts to guzzling coffee at all hours of the day, eating handfuls of peanuts in the car while driving to and from work/school, and scarfing down frozen dinners at 10:00 pm. Ahh!!
Therefore, I’m playing the Diabetes Personified wild card today, but I’ll keep it food-related!
One more disclaimer: As a former college English major, I must admit that my take on this exercise does not 100% meet the definition of personification. Cinnamon “cures” are not people, but they do affect people’s attitudes. So, please play along with the diabetes-cinnamon analogy here. Mostly, I just really freakin’ wanted to write this!
If diabetes were to take the form of a cinnamon “cure” concoction that actually worked in a non-spammer world, would I pour it in my coffee and watch the Dexcom CGM line even out with each sip?
Would it fade that scar on my right lower back? The one where the needle didn’t quite stick in all the way- so the nurse had to fiddle around with it until she could secure it with medical tape? When she quietly asked if she was hurting me as I fidgeted under her grasp, would I still mutter “It only hurts a little bit” through clenched teeth? Would my doctor still look on and pretend to believe me, mostly for the sake of my stubborn pride?
Would all of the needles and sleepless nights get swept away in a sea of cinnamon?
Would we inhale it like Afrezza, or tell Uncle Brad to “Pass the cinnamon, please” at Thanksgiving dinner?
Would we keep calm and bolus on? Or would we keep calm and cinnamon?
If diabetes were a cinnamon cure, would insurance still want Prior Approval? Would we be limited to one dab of cinnamon per month instead of the five that we might require to live healthy lives? Would paperwork swallow us whole?
Would some people not have access to cinnamon? Would we advocate long and hard for them?
What would the spammers say when the cinnamon cure suddenly worked for diabetes as advertised, its years of falsehood erased by a magic wand in the sky? Would the spammers tap the Staples “That was easy!” button in unison? Would they move on to the next groups- the cancer and the cystic fibrosis heroes? Would they diminish the battles that these human beings face each day by promoting a “cure” so ludicrous that society rationalizes its way out of the burden of easing their pain?
“It’s your fault. You didn’t eat the cinnamon.” And just like that the moral compass gets readjusted!
Would Wilford Brimley still say diabeetus? Would he order a very light, extra cinnamon coffee at the drive-thru before breaking out in a dance? Because of course he still has two functioning legs. He didn’t lose them like your grandma’s best friend’s tabby cat’s brother’s cousin did because he “failed” to “control” an autoimmune disease that doesn’t like to follow orders. He was cured by cinnamon. You heard it here first!
Would the #doc become the #coc- the Cinnamon Online Community? Would we have weekly #CSMA chats? Cinnamon Social Media Advocacy, it’s what all the cured kids are doing!
What happens to a cinnamon cure deferred? Does its powdery dust make an audible “poof” as it dissipates?
#IWishPeopleKnewThatCinnamon is silly, mon! (Said in best Jamaican accent)
Cinnamon pleases the taste buds, not the islet cells. If diabetes were as simple as a cinnamon cure, we wouldn’t enjoy all of the hidden blessings that we have grown to love through the complexity of managing this disease as best we can. It’s just not the same having a Kerri / Cinnamon, a Cinnamon Unconference, a @CinnamonCherise, a #dayofcinnamon Symplur hash tag, or a Cinnamon Hands Foundation- to name a few. The real life diabetes versions of these people, organizations, and events bring far more goodness to the world than cinnamon ever will. Perhaps our virtual paths would not have crossed if silly cinnamon cures actually worked. #Coc just doesn’t have the same ring to it as #doc, unless your mind is in the gutter!
Occasionally I sprinkle cinnamon in my coffee mug. Then I check myself in the mirror. It doesn’t hurt anymore, but the scar is still there on my back, a reminder of a disease that cannot be remedied by simple measures like cinnamon, a visible testament to the care I receive from others despite the pain, part of what gives us perspective and gratitude for the good days.
The needles are still required. There will be more tears, more laughter, and more perspective gained along the way. A sprinkle of cinnamon cannot make up for the other ingredients which have shaped our lives. Wacky cinnamon cure theories do not do justice to the crosses we have carried.
There are no Nutrition Facts on the packaging that is life with diabetes along for the ride- not the other way around. When we come together as a community, things are sweet enough to enjoy this #doc life for what it is without the artificial flavoring of ridiculous cure remedies.
For now, I’ll take one large coffee. Very light, no sugar. Hold the cinnamon, please.
19 thoughts on “If Diabetes Were A Cinnamon Cure”
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This was so much fun to read, and when you discuss the distribution and administration of the “cure”, really highlights the ridicularity of it all! Love it!
One thing though…I’d probably call it the Online Cinnamon Community rather than the COC. You down with OCC?
down with OCC? Yeah, you know me!! Love it!
Wonderful post, Ally! Funny but lots of truths hidden in the spoofs of cinnamon. “Would we be limited to one dab of cinnamon per month instead of the five that we might require to live healthy lives?” Ah, so true.
I can just see the insurance letters already!
Great post! Who doesn’t like a cinnamon spoof? “Would Wilford Brimley still say diabeetus?” Yes he certainly would, while discussing his cinnamon cure. HA!
Thanks, Liz! Wilford is stuck with his diabeetus lingo!
“would I pour it in my coffee and watch the Dexcom CGM line even out with each sip?” You know, if you inhale it, you just may flatline.
Hmmm. Cinnamon inhalers!
I love this post! So fun and well written. You’ll have to share it with the #COC. 🙂
Thanks! Also, I love your blog name! So awesome!
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This is great!!! I smiled the whole time reading it
Thanks for reading, Ashleigh!
Thanks for the shout out. Loved reading your posts this week and looking forward to reading more!
This made me giggle! Too clever. I also am down with Scott and OCC….
We definitely have a badass OCC theme song!